The day my uncle’s ‘I did’ proved to be louder than Parkinson’s disease
Building that table hadn't been easy, but he had something to prove — to himself
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There are few things more humbling than confidently giving someone credit for a job they didn’t do. That’s what happened to my family when an Ikea table suddenly showed up, fully assembled, in my aunt’s living room. Naturally, we assumed one of my cousins had put it together while everyone else was busy.
Uncle Brandon had been having a tough week. His tremors were more noticeable, his freezing episodes happened more often, and we just couldn’t picture him taking on a project that meant reading instructions, sorting hardware, and putting together so many pieces.
So we started congratulating my cousin, who looked at us with complete confusion. “I didn’t build the table,” he said.
That’s when we heard a familiar voice from the couch. “I did.”
Uncle Brandon never even looked away from the television. He simply cleared his throat and matter-of-factly claimed the credit, as if assembling Ikea furniture was just another Tuesday afternoon.
Proving something to himself
The room got quiet. We all looked at him. “You built it?” He nodded. Apparently, while everyone else was at church, he decided to tackle the project himself.
He later admitted it wasn’t easy. His tremors made him drop screws a few times. Some of the smaller pieces took longer to line up than they used to, and there were moments when he almost gave up. Instead, he kept going.
He said he glanced at the instructions now and then, but most of the work came from muscle memory. For decades, building and fixing things had been second nature to him. Long before Parkinson’s disease, he built furniture, fixed engines, and took on projects most people wouldn’t even try.
He trusted those years of experience. One screw at a time. One piece at a time. And one deep breath at a time.
When he finally tightened the last bolt, it wasn’t just a completed table sitting in the living room. It was proof that he could still finish what he started. Looking back, I don’t think Uncle Brandon was trying to prove anything to us. He was trying to prove something to himself.
The loudest voice in the room
Parkinson’s had taken away how easy these projects used to be for him. Things that once felt simple now took patience, determination, and plenty of breaks.
But the disease hadn’t taken away the craftsman inside him. It hadn’t erased the years of skill in his hands or the quiet confidence that reminded him, “You’ve done hard things before.” That afternoon reminded me that confidence doesn’t always come from accomplishing something perfectly. Sometimes it comes from refusing to quit.
As caregivers, we often worried about what Uncle Brandon couldn’t do anymore. We wanted to shield him from frustration, disappointment, and the chance of failing. But we didn’t realize that by trying to protect him from those things, we were also keeping him from the satisfaction of succeeding on his own.
Would it have been faster if one of us had assembled the table? Absolutely. Would it have been easier? Without question. But it wouldn’t have meant nearly as much.
That Ikea table never became anyone’s favorite piece of furniture. Years later, I can’t even remember what happened to it. What I do remember is the look of quiet satisfaction on Uncle Brandon’s face when he casually said, “I did.” For one afternoon, Parkinson’s wasn’t the loudest voice in the room. His confidence and assured stature were.
Note: Parkinson’s News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or another qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Parkinson’s News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Parkinson’s disease.
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