When Parkinson’s interrupted my uncle’s off-key shower concerts
After he fell, his singing stopped as he adjusted to changes to his shower routine
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If Uncle Brandon was taking a shower, chances were the rest of the house knew it.
Long before Bluetooth speakers and streaming playlists became commonplace, he had his trusty little Sony CD player. His grandkids had made him burned CDs filled with his favorite songs, and Uncle Brandon saw no reason to upgrade his technology when what he had worked perfectly fine.
One of his favorites was Z.Z. Hill’s “Down Home Blues.” I heard that song so many times I can still remember the chorus. Unfortunately, Uncle Brandon liked to contribute his own vocals. He would come home after a long day at work or hanging out, close the bathroom door, turn up his music, and sing loudly, enthusiastically, and off-key. B.B. King and Z.Z. Hill provided the talent. Uncle Brandon provided additional volume. His family provided an unwilling audience.
He didn’t care. It was his concert.
Changes to the routine
As Parkinson’s disease began changing his mobility, though, it eventually changed this routine, too.
Not long after his diagnosis, Uncle Brandon fell while showering and hurt himself. My aunt and his sons had to help him up. Beyond our concern about his physical safety, I remember what the incident seemed to do to a man who was already fighting hard to maintain his independence.
Soon afterward, a shower bench was installed. And Uncle Brandon would like everyone to know that he did not need it.
Sometimes, without anyone even asking, he’d announce that he could stand up on his own, thank you very much. We would calmly remind him that the bench was there to help keep him safe. He’d wave us off. Eventually, though, he sat down.
My aunt later said he realized the bench allowed him to relax a little while showering, something that hadn’t been part of his routine before. We kept his soap and other products within reach so he didn’t have to stretch or reach unnecessarily. The preinstalled handheld showerhead that came with the bathtub before his diagnosis made itself useful. My aunt could help him wash when he needed it, while his sons were available for more immediate assistance. I stayed in my lane.
I certainly wasn’t going into the bathroom with my uncle, but I’d stay nearby, bring him a towel if he needed one, and listen for anything that sounded unusual. We usually left the bathroom door cracked.
We were learning that keeping Uncle Brandon safe didn’t have to mean taking every bit of independence or privacy away from him. If he could do something safely for himself, we let him.
Tuning back in
Still, something was missing. The music.
For a while after his fall and the changes to his shower routine, that little Sony CD player stayed quiet. I can’t say exactly why. Maybe Uncle Brandon needed time to get comfortable with a routine that now included a bench, a cracked door, and family members nearby. I only know that his usual bathroom concerts disappeared.
Then one day, he called for me.
“Turn it on. Give me my CD player.” I was a little surprised. I hadn’t heard those familiar blues coming from the bathroom in a while.
I grabbed his Sony, turned it on, and jokingly told him his musical dream team was waiting for him.
“Down Home Blues” started playing. And then, once the water got turned on, Uncle Brandon started singing. At the top of his lungs.
Off-key. Of course.
Before Parkinson’s, those shower concerts had been something for the family to laugh about and endure. After weeks of not hearing them, his terrible singing sounded a little different to me.
The shower bench didn’t disappear. Neither did the cracked door or the need for someone to stay nearby. Parkinson’s had changed the way Uncle Brandon did something as private and ordinary as taking a shower. But eventually, the new routine became his routine.
And apparently, that meant the rest of us were expected to endure the bathroom concert again, too.
Note: Parkinson’s News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or another qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Parkinson’s News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Parkinson’s disease.
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