My turn to support the cheerleader who gives me the strength to keep going

I have written about both of my parents before, and the lessons their own lives have taught me about living with Parkinson’s disease. I’ve also written about how much my dad’s support has meant to me over the years.

Now it’s my turn to support him.

If you looked at my dad and me — an 83-year-old man and his 49-year-old daughter — and asked, “Which of these is the Parkinson’s patient?” you might assume the older man would be the one diagnosed with this awful disease. But it’s me who was diagnosed — 13 years ago, at the age of 36.

I don’t have children of my own, but I can imagine it’s never easy to hear that your child has something wrong with them that you can’t fix. Especially something rare like young-onset Parkinson’s disease. And that unease goes both ways. At 83, my father is now slowly losing his sight to macular degeneration, and I worry about his unfixable issue.

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My cheerleader and my example

My dad has been my No. 1 cheerleader as I have pushed myself to try new things to deal with my incurable disease. He has encouraged me to take advantage of physical therapy and other interventions to make life with Parkinson’s disease easier, and was by my side for my deep brain stimulation surgery seven years ago. His love and support are one reason I have never given up. And now that he has his own battle, it’s up to me, and the rest of his friends and family, to encourage him.

I know how easy it is to slip into the pity party when you are facing a seemingly unbeatable foe. And Dad and I have both had our moments of “woe is me” as we dealt with our individual diagnoses. But I am so proud of him for taking on his own monster and fighting back. He’s not sitting at home. He has a wonderful wife who is patient and kind through all of these changes, but he is standing up for the fight, too.

As age has stolen some of his agility, he has also done physical therapy to strengthen his gait and started classes to help him learn to navigate the world with his decreasing vision, use technology to help him “read” books and news, and use artificial intelligence tools on his phone to describe things he can’t see clearly. The classes and instructors encourage independence, which can feel daunting as your brain and body change.

It’s obvious that I get some of my willingness to fight back from my dad, and I also get some of my stubbornness from him. Like many older people, my dad has adopted some technology, but has had frustrations with his iPhone. Now, when I call him, he’s excited about the new tools he’s learning about. He sees how they can help him, and despite being set in his ways, he has even mentioned getting a newer model to take advantage of new apps and tools.

A life-changing diagnosis is always a struggle, at any age or stage of life. But thankfully, my dad and I have each other, and lots of other friends and family to encourage us. It would be much easier to stay home and let fear take over. And I’ll be honest: Being brave isn’t always the choice I want to make. But seeing my dad adapt and recognize that the rest of his life doesn’t have to be dictated by illness or changes in his body gives me strength to keep going.

Note: Parkinson’s News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or another qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Parkinson’s News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Parkinson’s disease.