A magical wedding with Parkinson’s as a guest
My daughter's ceremony, and her dance with her father, prove unforgettable
I was only 25 years old when I learned that I was going to be a mother. Although I still felt somewhat like a child myself, I couldn’t wait to become a mommy. I dreamed about meeting my baby every night for nine months straight.
Throughout each stage of my daughter’s life, I continued to dream about her, just as I had before she was born. As I dreamed, more questions popped into my head. Would she become a strong and independent woman? What career path would she take? Would she find her handsome prince (or princess), as happened in all of the Disney movies that she so passionately watched on repeat? Would she enjoy a long and happy life ahead?
To answer one of those questions, yes, Alexa met her handsome prince in Crown Heights, a neighborhood in Brooklyn, New York. While it didn’t quite resemble the fairy-tale villages of her beloved Disney movies, it was a fairy tale nonetheless.
On their first date, they meshed in every way possible. Both were public attorneys, and both had grown up in Ohio with a chronically ill parent. They could understand each other as few can. Not long after they met, they were engaged to be married.
From the first day of the wedding planning, Alexa and Andrew, her then-fiancé, insisted on selecting a venue that would be a comfortable and safe space for their families and other guests. They both understand the constant challenges of chronic illness and aging and selected a venue that would be friendly to all.
Throughout the wedding planning, we made many decisions based on what would best accommodate our uninvited wedding guest: my husband’s Parkinson’s disease. We selected a venue attached to a hotel for easy access to quick rests while being a short elevator ride away from the festivities. The after-party and farewell brunch were in the same building to make the weekend as simple as possible.
A few days before the wedding, a dear friend sent me the perfect text: “Wishing you the most wonderful weekend. Take it all in! It’s pretty magical.”
She was 100% correct; it was pure magic. I want to describe every detail of the weekend, but how do I put into words a weekend that left me speechless? Let’s give it a go.
The ceremony
The historic venue shimmered with hundreds of candles (over 200 candles were used to decorate the space) and an abundance of white flowers, which complemented the candles’ soft glow.
At my daughter’s request, my husband, Arman, and I walked our daughter down the aisle together. That gave me a sense of security, knowing I was right there, just in case. We made it down the aisle without a hitch and felt as though we were on top of the world. Kissing our daughter one last time before she became a wife was a moment that I’ll cherish forever. This is what life is all about, I remember thinking.
Arman is at risk for falls and has been experiencing them quite often lately. Our daughter had the brilliant idea to reserve a table where we could sit during cocktail hour. This part of events can be pretty stressful for me, so her idea to designate a place for us was incredibly helpful. We also gave our reception speeches right from those seats, which minimized Arman’s transitions.
There was not a dry eye to be found during the father-daughter dance. Their song was the Pretenders’ “I’ll Stand by You” (the version from “Glee,” a TV show), which was the perfect choice. Alexa even took a risk and gave her dad a spin. It was an unforgettable moment.
I love to dance at weddings, but I always sit with Arman so he doesn’t feel left out of the fun. To keep him safe, I held both of his hands. Still, he danced the night away with the crowd. It was priceless to dance together, and I felt as if we were in a dream.
The entire weekend was even more special than I could ever have imagined. All of the details fell into place, and all of my concerns regarding our uninvited guest, Parkinson’s, seemed to drift away.
After many years of wondering about the answers to all of my questions about my daughter, I finally have a clear vision of her future. It’s filled with sunshine, palm trees (they’ve recently relocated to Los Angeles), travels to faraway places, and a successful legal career — all alongside her handsome prince.
Note: Parkinson’s News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or another qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Parkinson’s News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Parkinson’s disease.
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