If you could live your life again, what would you do differently?

While walking through the soggy streets of Belfast, Northern Ireland, I saw an excerpt of a poem by American humorist Don Herold. It read:

“If I had my life to live over, I’d dare to make more mistakes next time. I’d relax; I’d limber up. I would be sillier than I have been this trip. … I would take more chances. … I would eat more ice cream and less beans. I would perhaps have more actual troubles, but I’d have fewer imaginary ones. … I would pick more daisies.”

The poem was written on a sign outside of Daisies Belfast (one of the best places for a chocolate fix in the city) as a reminder to those who passed it by. It struck me right in the chest and made my mind immediately jump to my dad, who’s known to sit by his window and watch the birds in his own version of “picking daisies.”

But he wasn’t always that way.

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Much of Dad’s adult life was driven by his entrepreneurial pursuits. He wanted to provide a good life for his family, so he could usually be found at the office, looking to make another sale.

Dad’s pace of life has drastically slowed since his Parkinson’s diagnosis more than 10 years ago. The change didn’t happen all at once; rather, it was as if, year by year, he grew more accustomed to living a slower life. His mobility changed, and then his symptoms began to affect him at work. He retired early and was left with a drastically different lifestyle.

While I know the change of pace was forced upon him, and it’s not always convenient, a lot of good has come from the shift.

The slower pace of life has given my dad a lot of time to reflect. He seems to grow softer and more empathetic each year, ever quicker to express his love for us. He’s more appreciative of the little things, like a plate full of pierogies or the squirrels that romp through the front yard.

I’ve asked him if he’d do anything differently if he could live his life over, like Herold imagined. Would he be sillier? Relax more? He eats a lot of ice cream as it is — would he eat more? It’s a question I find particularly interesting, especially when asking someone who’s lived a full life.

Usually Dad tells me that he would’ve married my mom sooner and perhaps made some different choices regarding his health. He would’ve gone to church more often and laughed a little more. I’ve never seen my dad pick daisies, but he sure likes to water them.

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