Caregiving Unfiltered – a Column by Crystal Onyema

As you probably know by now if you’ve been reading my column, my late uncle Brandon liked to stay on the move. His career involved hands-on work, building things from the ground up, and figuring out problems on his own. That hardworking mentality wasn’t just part of his job. It…

Faith has always been at the center of my family’s life. As I grew up, I saw my family face tough times, believing that God would help us through. Strength, prayer, perseverance, and trust in God were just part of our daily lives. So, when my uncle Brandon was diagnosed…

Before Parkinson’s disease, my late uncle Brandon was always on the move. He always needed something to do, especially on weekends. If he wasn’t planning a hunting trip, he was outside grilling ribs, sausage, or brisket and inviting neighbors over without a second thought. The house was rarely quiet.

One of the toughest things about caregiving wasn’t always the words themselves. It was figuring out how to say them. As my uncle Brandon’s Parkinson’s disease progressed, there were certain conversations we couldn’t avoid. One of the biggest was about his mobility and the need for more support. Specifically,…

As I’ve previously mentioned, my late uncle Brandon loved a good “chill and grill.” He didn’t just grill for fun. He could put together a full Texas-style feast that always seemed to appear out of nowhere. As a kid, I used to wonder how he managed to get ribs,…

I was his niece, but Uncle Brandon meant much more to me. He felt like a second father. Back then, my dad worked nights as he tried to build his teaching career, so we didn’t see him much. To be honest, there was also an emotional distance. He grew up…

Caregiving brings a kind of guilt that isn’t about making mistakes. It shows up when you try your best but still wonder if it was enough. I felt that one night with my late Uncle Brandon. He loved the racing drag strip — the sounds, the energy, and being in…

I didn’t expect just how much my relationship with my late uncle Brandon would change over the years. When I was a kid, he was always the one who got everyone going in the morning. I remember us kids staying up too late playing Nintendo, thinking we were sneaky. No…

One of the initial things I didn’t understand when I became a Parkinson’s caregiver was that not everyone is ready to share their diagnosis right away. From the outside, it can feel like something that should just be said so that people understand what’s going on. But for my…

Some of the moments that stay with me the most aren’t the big, expected ones. They’re the moments that caught me off guard, when everything felt a little tense, a little uncertain, and then somehow turned into something I ended up laughing about later. One evening, after spending the day…